I lost

All of a sudden I'm afraid, to face her again, even to look at her in the eyes. I thought I was able to stand up again and say confidently to myself and my friends around me that I've gotten over her. Yet today, as she was sitting beside me, I don't even dare to look at her... it seems that the courage that I've built up over these past few months had gone down the drain... is it that I still haven't gotten over her deep in my heart yet deceiving myself that the converse is true? Or is it that the happenings around my close friends has made my confidence taken a big knock?

Haiz.... do things really have to be so bad till I can't even talk to her? God knows...